“Do stuff. Be clenched, curious…Pay attention… Attention is vitality.
It connects you with others. It makes you eager. Stay eager.”
I spend a lot of time in my stories of being rushed and tired. In order to manage this I have focused a lot on rest and sleep. And what I am noticing recently is rest and sleep don’t always make a huge amount of difference to my feelings of wearyness.
Recently I had the most wonderful weekend with a group of women at a cottage east of Toronto on the most beautiful lake. I felt so completely re-vitalised at the end of the weekend even though my sleep hadn’t been long or deep. The weekend challenged my stories of myself. I went in a canoe for the first time ever, and Loved it. I swam in the lake (I love being close to water, but my story since childhood holidays by the seaside in the UK, with the freezing Atlantic water, is that I’m not a strong swimmer and I don’t like being in water cooler than a bath), and I Loved it (even when I saw what I thought was a water snake swimming toward me and had a complete splashy panic).
The vitality came from feeling alive with the activities, the connections, the conversations, and with encouraging myself outside of my comfort zone. I felt connected simultaneously to my mind, body and spirit, and to the world around me.
I love being alone. Since I was young I’ve felt (maybe too) comfortable with my own company. This works well until it doesn’t. And this particular weekend I was with women I knew and women I didn’t. And instead of old feelings of having to try to fit in, I was just able to be: Not feel I had to show up as anything other than myself. Not feel I had to be ‘on’ in order to make others ok. It was safe space to just be me.
So if you are feeling tired or weary, I encourage you to, of course, look after your sleep habits, but to also nourish parts of you that need to see some daylight – the creative parts, the adventurous parts, the curious parts and maybe the parts that scare you a little. That scared feeling might actually be excitement.
What do you think you need to revitalize your self/selves?
Who can support you with this?